


Is That An Ace Up Your Sleeve?

by The_Mouse_of_Anon



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Batman: The Animated Series, Batwoman (Comic)
Genre: Bruce and his bad habit of not telling basic information, Gen, Kate does not believe you Bruce, Kate has a complaint, Kate what even is your rating system?, indulgent Batfam interactions because there isn't enough playing with the fact that they're cousins, nosy cousin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-11
Updated: 2019-08-11
Packaged: 2020-08-19 08:56:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20207092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Mouse_of_Anon/pseuds/The_Mouse_of_Anon
Summary: Kate Kane was a strong-willed person, and so was Bruce. The two of them wouldn't do what they did at night if they weren't. The thing was, Bruce was hiding a secret and Kate knew it. True, the two of them weren’t as close as they had been when they were kids, but she still knew her cousin well enough to know when he was lying through his teeth on some things.And his whole playboy act wasn’t cutting it.





	Is That An Ace Up Your Sleeve?

**Author's Note:**

> We all know Kate Kane is a blatant lesbian who won’t be stopped. We also know that Bruce Wayne’s playboy facade is just that– a facade. Cue my mind playing with the idea of the two of them spending time together and Kate deciding to test her cousin’s ‘I love women and flirt with and check them out shamelessly’ routine and you get this.
> 
> (Originally published on tumblr August 5, 2017.)

Bruce was hiding a secret and Kate _knew it_. True, the two of them weren’t as close as they had been when they were kids, but she still knew her cousin well enough to know when he was lying through his teeth on some things. And his whole playboy act wasn’t cutting it.

So she decided to test it.

Okay, so dragging him out to lunch in a highly populated area– open air restaurants were a joy and were the only way to pull this off– was a little underhanded, but compared to some of the things she got up to as Batwoman this was nothing. And if her darling cousin, ‘Brucie’ Wayne, wasn’t going to own up to the fact that he _wasn’t_ sleeping around like it was going out of style– at least to her anyway– then she was going to prod at him until he finally said something.

Their conversation had been over relatively mundane things for a while with both of them lazily indulging in familial small talk which neither of them really needed to pay much attention to. (Apparently Dick had gotten into a wrestling match with Jason and managed to somehow temporarily dislocate his own thumb while Jason had face-planted into a couch.) It was as Bruce was clearly about to ramble on about his other kids that Kate subtly jerked her head to motion to a woman across the street.

“Check it out Bruce. A complete 10 at three-o’clock,” she murmured.

Bruce blinked, completely derailed and looking for a moment or two as if he had no idea what Kate was even talking about. When he finally looked it was like the light-bulb went on, if a little dimly. “She’s nice… Not really my type though,” he said quietly.

“What, don’t like redheads?” She teased, prompting him to roll his eyes.

“It’s not that.”

“Mmhm. Alright then, What abooout… Over there? The barista on the corner?”

Bruce took a moment or two to locate who Kate was talking about. “…I’m pretty sure she’s a little young Kate.”

“Wrong. I got coffee from her earlier. She looks like she’s in her 20s from a distance, turns out she’s in her mid-40s and has owned that place for close to 20 years.” Kate took a drink from her water to cover the smirk threatening to creep onto her face.

Bruce looked mildly uncomfortable. “Please tell me you weren’t flirting at her while she was on the job.”

“Me? No. Perish the thought. I’m not dumb enough to trap a woman at work.” She took another solid drink before putting her glass down. “You, however, should go see if you can get her number. I’m 90% certain she’s into men, and you could do worse than to land a nice responsible hottie like that.”

Bruce looked even more uncomfortable, and not a little flustered. “I’m not really looking to hook up with anyone Kate. I’ve got more to worry about than-”

She couldn’t hide the smirk. “No? Bruce Wayne? My supposedly womanizing cousin having no interest in even seeing if he can get a woman’s number? For shame.”

Bruce frowned. “Kate, I’m not just going to wander up to a random woman and ask her out. Especially when I haven’t even talked to her. That’s creepy.”

Kate hummed thoughtfully as she lazily circled one finger on the rim of her glass. “Would you say she’s a 10? I’d say she’s a 10. Maybe… a 10.9.”

“Why?”

Rather than answer, she instead replied, “Or what about the silver fox a few tables down? She’s pretty. Maybe a 9, but she’s got that natural plain beauty going on…”

Bruce facepalmed and grumbled, “I am _not_ having this conversation with you.”

“Is it because ‘all women are beautiful’ Bruce?” she asked in an entirely-too-innocent and chipper tone.

“Please don’t ever use that voice again.”

“_Well_?”

He gave an aggravated sigh. “Yes. Are you happy now?”

Kate snickered. “Bruce, do us both a favor and stop lying to your damn cousin. You barely even looked at those women and you’re not interested in women.”

“Now wait just a second-” he started.

“Just admit that you’re an ace piece of shit trying to pretend that you have an uncontrollable libido when actually you’ve probably never slept with anyone in your life.”

Bruce stared at her a moment or two. Finally he said, “Remind me again _why_ I stopped having any sort of talks like this with you back when we were teenagers?”

Kate smirked in satisfaction. While he hadn’t said anything close to the words ‘Yes I’m ace now please STOP’ his tone had been more than confirmation enough. “It might have had something to do with the fact that for a while I had my suspicions that you and Harvey might have been an item. Though considering how close the two of you were back then, you can’t exactly blame me.”

“…And you felt the need to drag me out here for _this_.” They were cousins, they knew each other well, so it was unsurprising that he’d finally caught on.

“Sorry Brucie. You weren’t talking and I didn’t feel like stalking you for a month to get you to tell me something so stupidly basic.”

Another aggravated sigh. “What did I do to deserve having family like this?”

Kate gave him a knowing look and retorted, “You know exactly what our family is like cousin. Even the kids. Consider it… Letting you know when you’re overdoing it.”

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry, not sorry. Ace Bruce ftw.


End file.
